‘Abla Nari’

Are there any possibilities that a woman, who faces challenges in her personal life, will not be labeled as a coward or does not have the courage to take a stance to move ahead in life in her own way?

Hardly so! Not that it matters to many, even if they are financially independent, but I am sharing my views on women I know, including myself who do not hesitate to accept the harsh realities of life, hold on to their self-respect, create their own identity, and are yet trapped by circumstances. 

Though the notion of being considered an ‘Abla Nari’ (a helpless woman) is a common thing with our society, I have observed that a woman, who faces troubles in her personal life, is nevertheless considered to be weak and can be taken advantage of in any respect, especially in the personal zone.

The series of lockdowns post COVID have brought out real-life stories from the closet to my table like never before. I also realized the fact that a woman facing personal turmoil is considered to be a woman easily available for one-night stands, hook-ups and et al. It is taken for granted that she will fall for the bait to go to bed with anyone at the drop of a hat.

I mean, are we not overdoing all of this in our society, as men and women at large? Is it too difficult to digest the fact that a troubled lady can hold onto her own guns, have her own voice, can fend for herself, hold her self-respect and walk ahead with a head held high, irrespective of the trapped situations?

I guess it is. Again not that it matters to many of us, but to weigh this attitude and approach on a social scale definitely brings a result undesired and uncalled for.  As a matter of fact, making a passé to a woman is a thing that lies in a person's fingertips; as if that is the only thing she is looking for in life.

It is not about whether it makes any difference to the woman, but she deserves respect and should not be treated as an element for sex, even if I am not writing on the other aspects of this social attitude in this article.

The so-called ‘Abla Nari’ faces various challenges in life and again may not be able to take charge due to her circumstances, but she is not helpless in every way. However, that she is self-sufficient and headstrong should be a fact to be digested and accepted by the so-called decent society.

Take it or leave it, she is neither craving for attention nor is she dependent on sexual approaches to remain happy the way she is. This is not cool or a joke, albeit treated as one. 

The so-called ‘Abla Nari’ is determined and strong, giving importance to up-skilling herself and accepting the hard realities of life. She lies in you, in me. In us.